Commissioner Standy Willnus, announces the Loggers protection and cuts list.....
Protected:
Adolis "Adonis" Garcia (well hello again, Mrs. Cabrera)
Gio "Ursula The Sea Witch" Urshela
Jarren Duran "Duran"
Mitch "Ryder & The Detroit Wheels" Garver
Isaac "I Love A Parade" Paredes
Gunnar "Florence" Henderson
Kerry "Karen" Carpenter
Ceddanne "of Green Gables" Rafaela
Luis "Marty" Castillo
Griffin Jax "Car Wash"
Joe "Nolan" Ryan
Jon "Not Sonny" Gray
Jason Adam "12"
Carlos "Rodan - CAW!" Rodon
Jacob "Spider" Webb
Tyler "Horton Hears a Who" Holton
"Grand Rapids" Griffin Canning "of Worms"
DARVISH/NL Protected:
Christian "Bale" Vasquez
"Radio" D.J. LeMahieu
Paul "What's The Difference Between" Black "ened, and" Burn "ed?"
Colin "Pooch" Poche
Nick "Expectations Weren't" Loftin
Luis "Tiant" Medina
Cut, but non-draftable card:
A-Aron Hicks "From French Lick"
The Loggers would like to bid adieu to DJ LeMahieu who was a stud for the first few seasons after Maine acquired him for TWO first round picks a few years back from Montreal, but steadily declined with each hamstring pull and lower back strain the past few years. Always an on-base machine and steady fielder, LeMahieu leaves Maine with a ring, and our eternal gratitude for several good years anchoring the Maine infield at several positions.
Also departing is another trade acquisition, A-Aron Hicks. Hicks was acquired for a second-round pick from Wichita, and far-outperformed our expectations of him. Another guy who could draw walks like there is no tomorrow, Hicks also showed decent power at one point in his career, along with an always steady glove in left and center. He'll be missed.
The Loggers look forward to making another run at a league title in 2025. They've come a long way since 1907.....
I am late with my comment but I want to continue to show my appreciation for the comedic stylings of Steve Willnus when it comes to Protection and Cuts lists :-) Favorite for me this year is the highbrow literary reference of "Ceddanne of Green Gables Rafaela"!!! There was a definite 1970's influence with Adam 12, Florence Henderson, Karen Carpenter, and Mitch Ryder all contributing. I would recommend an 1980's update for Luis "Funky Cold" Medina :-) Most creative was the multi-layered "Grand Rapids Griffin Canning of Worms" which sounds straight out of Ken Jennings' "Before and After" Jeopardy category! I am still diagramming the Paul Blackburn one, will get back to you once I break down all the twists and turns of one nickname. Always a pleasure to read, thank you for your service!
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