Loggers Post 2016 Protection Players

2016 Protections
Mitch "Find me some" More Land
Alex "Corn Chowder" Avila
Ben "Zobrilla" Zobrist
Anthony (use Scooby Voice) GOSE?!
Asdrubal "Ass-Double-Dribble" Cabrera
Avisail "Little Miggy" Garcia
Jose "Joey Bats" Bautista
Nick "Catch A Falling Star" Castellanos
J.D. "Salinger" Martinez
Sonny, Sonny, Sonny Gray
Jose Quintana (end of Jaws: "Quint?"  "No.....")
Michael "Pinata" Pineda
Aaron "Chopped" Sanchez
Shawn "Don't Mistake Me for Steve" Tolleson
Luke "I am Your Father" Gregerson
Brian "Bobcats Gave Up On Me" Matusz

NL/Darvish Protected: Christian "Bale" Vasquez
Relinquishing rights to: Cliff "Clavin" Lee

Cut like a fart in the breeze:
"The old" Billy "Barue" Butler "Did It"
Omar "Enriquo Pallazzo" Infante
Michael "Jason" Bourn "Supremacy"
Jeremy "little gust of wind, Holmes" Guthrie
Shane "Country Day Battier" Greene
"He went to" Jarrod Parker (no card, again!)
Ryan "15 pieces of Flair" Flaherty

Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: We need to talk about your flair.
Joanna: Really? I... I have fifteen pieces on. I, also...
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: Well, okay. Fifteen is the minimum, okay?
Joanna: Okay.
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: Now, you know it's up to you whether or not you want to just do the bare minimum. Or... well, like Brian, for example, has thirty seven pieces of flair, okay. And a terrific smile.
Joanna: Okay. So you... you want me to wear more?
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: Look. Joanna.
Joanna: Yeah.
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: People can get a cheeseburger anywhere, okay? They come to Chotchkie's for the atmosphere and the attitude. Okay? That's what the flair's about. It's about fun.
Joanna: Yeah. Okay. So more then, yeah?
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: Look, we want you to express yourself, okay? Now if you feel that the bare minimum is enough, then okay. But some people choose to wear more and we encourage that, okay? You do want to express yourself, don't you?
Joanna: Yeah, yeah.
Stan, Chotchkie's Manager: Okay. Great. Great. That's all I ask.

Wait, was the above a rerun from last year?  Rerun?!
Schwarzenager: Killian.  I'll be back.
Dawson: Only in a rerun. 
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jm4FEjICVog

Well, we bid adieu to The Ol' Billy Barue Butler here in 2016.  While I don't compile all the lifetime team stats that Kansas City does, I'm quite sure that Billy leaves the Loggers holding the all time record for grounding into the most double plays.  He was slow, he couldn't field a position, but for a few years he could hit.  Boy could he hit, and at times, you thought he was actually on fire.  But, much like the red-hot Biederman Comet in Deep Impact, he slammed into a planet, caused a tsunami, and then receded quickly.  And boy did he recede.  WAR Ratings be damned....we still love you Billy.  Good luck catching on with some lucky team in the waiver draft that values 29 year-olds with 45 year-old bodies.  I'm sure you'll do great things.  Along with grounding into a few DP's.  Cheers to Billy. 

LOGGERMANIA!!!
Available for Trade:  Avisail "Little Miggy" Garcia.  Would also listen to monster offers for J.D. or Joey Bats too!  Channeling Thunderdome: 3 Rightfielders enter....2 Rightfielders leave....